Carer’s Diary
Ms X is a single mother caring for two daughters with learning disabilities. Her older daughter lives on her own while the younger daughter lives with Ms X and is studying at college in a special needs class. Her son lives with her ex-husband. Everyday her older daughter visits at around 3.30pm, the time Ms X normally gets home.
Monday
As usual Ms X gets up at 6.30am to prepare breakfast and lunch for herself and her younger daughter. She usually has a light breakfast before dashing out to work, and of course there was no exception this morning. Her work starts at about 7.30am and luckily her home is not too far from her work. It usually takes about 15 minutes to get there. She works as a cleaner in shop. She had a busy morning and at about 3.30pm left and drove back home. Her older daughter was waiting for her in the sitting room. She prepared some snacks for them and then went out shopping to get something for dinner.
When they got back, her younger daughter had returned. They talked for a bit and then her younger daughter went to her room and Ms X started preparing the meal. At mealtime, the older daughter was not too happy because the food was not to her taste. She didn't make any comment, but her feelings showed clearly on her face. Ms X felt upset because her older daughter didn't seem to appreciate all her hard work. Of course, She knew that she should not have been cross with her, but she didn't know why she was so angry. Her older daughter didn't say a word before she went home herself. Ms X would usually spend some time with her younger daughter but she was so exhausted that after cleaning the kitchen she washed herself and went straight to bed.
Tuesday
She got up a bit late because her alarm clock failed to ring. Once she had got up she went straight to the kitchen to prepare lunch for her daughter and herself. She didn't have anything before going to work. She knew her daughter hated rushing, but she just didn't have time to explain it to her. She felt guilty for starting their day like that. She should have thrown that alarm clock away because it was not the first time it had happened. The whole morning she didn't say a word to anybody and barely managed a smile before she left her work. Thank goodness it was time to go home. She didn't like making her young daughter unhappy. Her young daughter hates her routine being interrupted and she would usually be very grumpy and uncooperative.
When she arrived home her older daughter was not in, perhaps held up in the traffic. She quickly went straight to the kitchen to prepare their tea for tonight. It wasn't long before her older and younger daughter got home. They both looked angry and she knew something was wrong. They'd had a real fight. They didn't go out because her older daughter was extremely upset and so they had their tea earlier than usual. After that she tried to explain to her older daughter what had happened to her sister. Somehow it was difficult to explain and after tea she walked to the bus stop with her but they did not talk. When she got back home her younger daughter was locked in the room. Sometimes she heard a banging noise.
Wednesday
She did not sleep too well because she was worried that the alarm clock would fail to work. This morning she got up at about 6.00am and started to prepare a nice breakfast and lunch for both of them. They had breakfast together. Her daughter didn't look happy but at least wasn't agitated like yesterday. She drove her to college because she had plenty of time. Today went past more quickly than usual and after work she went to get a new alarm clock. Her older daughter was at home watching TV. The weather was not bad and so they ate something and then went to the supermarket to get something for dinner.
Later while she was preparing the dinner she told her older daughter to wash the car for her. To her surprise she did what Ms X asked. She was so pleased. At about 5pm her younger daughter arrived home and they waited till she settled for a while. They then had tea together. Later she asked her older daughter what she had done that day. She was not too happy because her support worker hadn't turned up and didn't tell her. Ms X tried to calm her down and told her not to rely on her support worker too much, she should try to learn to be more independent. After the older daughter left, Ms X went to the kitchen to finish her work. Before she went to sleep she went to have a good chat with her younger daughter. She looked happier today and they had a good laugh before both of them went to sleep.
Thursday
Everything went well in the morning. She finished her work at the usual time. When she got home her older daughter was sitting watching TV and having snacks. She told her to clear up the place but she was a little reluctant to do it. She praised her and promised to take her to see a movie on Saturday in return for cooperative behaviour. They went out for a while but it wasn't long because her daughter's feet were sore. Her younger daughter arrived home at the usual time and they had tea together then all watched TV. At around 8pm she walked to the bus stop with her older daughter. When home, she talked with with her younger daughter and then went to bed.
Friday
She finished work at 1pm today and went to visit her older daughter. She knew the Chinese support worker was with her in the afternoon and she wanted to chat to her to see whether she had taken her daughter to do any voluntary work. Her older daughter needs people to persuade her into doing things. If not, she prefers to stay at home and do nothing. When Ms X arrived at her daughter's, someone told her that her daughter had put her rubbish into someone’s bins. The support worker had already left when she arrived. She explained to her daughter about putting the rubbish into someone's bin was annoying. They then went shopping before going home. They had tea in a coffee shop and a good long chat about the support worker and what they had done that week.
Her younger daughter had finished earlier today and when they got home she was there. The two daughters had a chat then watched TV together. They all had a lovely meal. Her older daughter said she wanted to stay with them tonight and so Ms X made a bed up for her. They spent the evening watching TV and snacking. They went to bed very late but had a lovely time.
Saturday
Ms X and her daughters all got up very late this morning. She prepared something different for breakfast because she had the time to do it. Usually she prepares porridge but today a continental breakfast. Her daughters love having western food. They did not say much but both looked happy. After breakfast, they went shopping. As the weather was not too bad they also went to the beach at Portobello. As her younger daughter has balance problems Ms X had to be around wherever she went. She made sand castles with them.
When they got home they started to prepare some dumplings for tomorrow because Ms X's son would be visiting. Her daughters had a small fight because both of them wanted to be better than the other. They had their tea at about 6pm and after the meal they helped Ms X clean up. They all went for a walk before escorting the older daughter to the bus stop. Ms X was so exhausted when she got home she went straight to bed.
Sunday
Ms X got up very early today because her son would be coming. She tidied the house and after that she went to the nearby supermarket to get some flowers for the sitting room. Time passed much faster than usual. Perhaps she was in a happy mood. At around 5pm her son came and he brought her some special fruits. She was so pleased to see him. She had been in the kitchen almost the whole morning to prepare something nice for dinner. Her son helped her serve the tea and they had a good time together. After the meal, they watched TV together and had the fruit as well. At around 8pm her son took the older daughter home. Ms X went back to the kitchen to finish off her work and then had a chat with her younger daughter before she went to bed.
